Steph’s Story

Single adopter Steph always wanted to be a mum. After realising she had the space in her heart and home to adopt, she started the process with a phone call.

Steph’s journey took less than 12 months as she welcomed her daughter into the family.

“The process for me was extremely therapeutic. It’s in-depth and goes into detail about life experiences and how I would parent a child.

The best part of the adoption process was the adoption panel. I cried once I had been approved at the panel because it all became real. I was so happy to finally realise that I would become a mum.

Like most single mums, I was worried at first and had doubts. I didn’t know if I would be able to look after a little person all on my own.

The responsibility was a little overwhelming. However, I am lucky to have a great support network of friends and family.

But, being a single adopter has helped build the bond between myself and my daughter. We can stick to one set of rules and boundaries which helps towards creating that secure and safe attachment.

The bonding experience happened quickly. When she started to say mummy, those moments make your heart pound and that’s when it feels very special.

I attended a therapeutic parenting course, which at the time I didn’t feel was necessary. However, I am so happy to have those techniques and tools ready to use in the future.

The support team are there if you need them, they have a range of free online sessions which I have also attended.

We have letterbox contact with some birth family members. Keeping her identity alive is so important and I want her to know she was loved and never rejected. As she gets older she can help write those letters and she can look back on them whenever she needs to.

The advice I would give to anyone thinking about adopting is to make that phone call.

My experience has been so positive, but it also comes with its challenges. Sometimes the behaviours are difficult to manage but the reward outweighs everything.”