5 tips on Non Violent Resistance – A parenting presence

Our children need us to be there for them physically and emotionally.

Sometimes we can lose presence with our child when they sense we aren’t “really there.”  There could be all kinds of reasons – being ill, tired, or maybe your attention is focused on someone/something else. It might not even be for very long, but when this happens, your child could be very aware of that.

When our parental presence is diminished, our children’s behaviours and challenges are likely to escalate. This happens due to a lack of communication and feelings of disconnection.

There are a few tips below to help raise your presence

• Let them “overhear” you saying something positive about them. This demonstrates that you are thinking of them even when you are physically not together.
• Communicate with the parents of your child’s friends. This demonstrates a positive interest in your child’s life outside of the family home.
• If your child spends a lot of time in their bedroom, make a point of checking in, and having a regular chat.
• Show an interest in the things they enjoy. Spend some time with them doing something they love, whether that is playing Lego, watching them play a sport, or doing a funny dance routine.  The power of showing an interest in your child’s interests cannot be underestimated.
• Spend 10 minutes everyday giving your child your undivided attention.  Your child will experience that you are invested in their news, opinions and experiences.  There is a huge difference in using this “active listening” approach, rather than talking whilst multi-tasking, watching TV or flicking through a mobile phone.